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For me to engage in anal sex, I need to be fully relaxed, lubed, and ready. Anne Hodder, ACS, a multi-certified sex and relationships educator, says a successful anal experience is most often the result of communication, relaxation, preparation, lubrication, and at least initially gentle stimulation.

Here are my top 25 tips on how to enjoy anal sex :. If someone has to convince you to do something, say no. There needs to be a solid level of trust.

For me, anal sex requires a higher level of trust than vaginal sex. There are these concepts called consent and communication.

Accidental anal is not OK. Let go of any expectations. Instead of immediately focusing on full penetration, try to be as present as possible, and enjoy the buildup and arousal.

Sometimes, it takes a few tries to make it happen. Your butt is beautiful. It may not be your most favorite body part, but the reality is that someone will be looking at it, they may be licking it, and if all goes as planned, penetrating it.

All butts are beautiful. I know, I know — this is easier said than done. Like you mean it deep breaths. A calm mind will hopefully set your ass at ease.

Slow and low is the tempo. I cannot emphasize this enough. Go as slow as you need. Start small. Instead of going for the biggest dildo in your bedside arsenal, start with something small, like a single lubed finger, and work your way up.

If your partner ejaculated into your anus, it will feel even slipperier and may look a little strange too. Farts can also feel different traveling down your lubed-up butthole.

But if you have a lot of blood, or ongoing pain, give your doctor a call. Anal sex is unfortunately still saddled with a bad rap, but it can be immensely pleasurable for giver and receiver alike, and can be a fun new journey to embark on together.

Give butt love a chance! And the second. And the third. Oh, and, for those afraid of poo-dick — it has happened to me exactly once in 18 years of having this kind of sex with my partners.

It was a little traumatizing, but I went straight to the bathroom and took a quick shower, and voila, no more poo. Everything you need to know about and expect during.

The A. After Hours. Vanessa Marin. Filed to: anal. Share This Story. Your anus is full of sensitive nerve endings that make anal play feel oh so good.

Anal training can make anal penetration of any kind pleasurable. It can also help you work up to larger anal toys and other butt play, like gaping.

This makes it more prone to tearing and infection, including sexually transmitted infections STIs. Taking it slow, using lots of lube , and practicing safer sex can help.

Along with elasticity in your tissues that help them flex and contract, mental relaxation is a big part of anal training. Take fisting, for example.

Fingers are a good place to start because you can begin with a pinky and work your way up to five fingers, or even an entire hand or fist.

You can also use sex toys. Anal dilators, also called rectal dilators, are medical devices used to widen the rectum after anorectal surgery to help make passing stool easier.

Dilators — which you can find online — used for pleasure are similar, though the goal is slightly different, obvs. Their shape is pretty basic — usually smooth and tubular.

They generally have narrow tips that gradually widen toward the middle then taper down again. Their shape makes them easy to insert and helps to keep them comfortably contained in your anus even in the throes of ecstasy.

A flared base prevents them from getting sucked in, sparing you from being one of those Untold Stories of the ER cases that goes viral.

They come in all sorts of lengths and widths, ranging from small like this one for anal training amateurs to some pretty intimating monster-sized plugs like this one for seasoned pros.

You can also buy butt plug trainer kits online, like this one. If you like cock and want a sex toy that looks more like the real thing, then dildos are the way to go.

They come in just about every length and girth so you can work your way up as you please. Like a little whimsy with your anal workout? If this is your first foray into anal play and stretching, starting small is a must even if you think you can handle more.

In toys, something between 0. An anal training kit like this one by VuVatech is perfect for beginners. Size matters, but here are some other things to consider when choosing toys to stretch your anus.

Look for toys that are phthalate and BPA -free. You want enough weight for the plug to stay put and not shoot from your butt with a sneeze, but it also needs to be comfortable.

To say you have a lot of options would be an understatement. It comes down to your comfort level, but aim to train once or twice a day, at least 5 days a week, for 5 to 10 minutes at a time.

Most fecal matter sits higher up in your rectum, but anal play can bring on the urge to poop. Using a rectal douche to clean out poop in the lower rectum can help.

You can buy enema kits online or in drugstores. Enemas are safe as long as you only use them occasionally and as directed on the packaging.

Be sure to use lube on the tip before insertion. Try a hot bath, a massage, or some foreplay to help you get your stretch on.

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